Dear Sis and Boo,
One day you will look back and ask why there aren't any posts from the past six months, and I am going to quickly remind you of all the changes that have taken place!
Let's blame it on Daddy. From the time the both of you were old enough to hold your heads up, you have been attending Clemson events. He was even so sure that Sis was going to go to school in South Carolina that he enrolled you in prepay tuition. When you were little, it seemed so far away. We moved back to Georgia, but we knew that you still had that option in South Carolina to attend school at the locked in rate. As the years passed, we realized that it was quickly approaching the time to either move or give up this option.
We thought we were going to outsmart the system, and just buy a house right across the border in Carolina. We even took you in the winter of 2015 to a house in Savannah Lakes on the golf course and choose a room. We were going to put our house up for sale and everything would be perfect. What we didn't know at the time was that the plan wasn't going to work out like that. Later that year, I had a whirlwind experience at work and began doubting my position. I felt like a turtle in a shell and didn't like it! Looking back now, I am so glad that I experienced this! I am firm believer that trials and tribulations make us so much stronger. As the year went on, we knew we needed security and happiness.
When we returned from the National Championship in Arizona, many things began to unfold that I felt like were my fault. Was I too worried with work, was I too focused on trying to control things, was I trying to map out your lives without considering what was actually best for you... and not me. My heart has never hurt as badly as it did during those months. Through all the conversations, the "talks", the prayers... Daddy and I decided that moving was the best thing for all of us. I knew it was the best thing because I would no longer be the one who was in control of everything. I would have to get out of that boat that I had been comfortably riding in to walk on the water a little while.
In February we tried our best to get you enrolled in a private school that we fell in love with immediately. We visited, we shadowed, and we were ready to start. I had no job, we had a house to sell, and we needed somewhere to live. Out of the blue, my old school system called me to ask a question, and I shared that we were planning on moving back to the area. I didn't really want to work at the old school because I wanted to be with the two of you. I wanted to be on your schedule. As the weeks went by, I kept having contact with the old system, and I kept feeling like I might need to just visit. The morning I decided to come "talk" to them, I ended up pulling into the LC schools, checking you out, and letting you come with me. We entered the front door of the high school and your best friend from K-5 and 1st grade was standing in the lobby. She had no idea you were coming, and you embraced each other just like you did when you were little. As we walked down the halls of the school, I knew immediately that everything had happened for that moment. The feeling can't even be described of the security and comfort I had. I knew that I would be working there for the upcoming school year if they would hire me again. I will never forget getting in the car as we were leaving and Sis saying, "Mama, I want to go to school here!" As we drove out of the parking lot, my eyes were filled with tears because you had felt what I felt. We decided to head over to the middle school and let Ben see if he liked it. Walking back into the building with the same people who were there for both of your births reminded me of visiting long lost friends. They were so welcoming, so loving, and so caring. It had been decided that we would come back to where you started... without ever talking to Daddy!
In the next few months, we had decided on a place to live. For the first time in my twenty years of marriage, I can honestly say we have a home that I love! There is something comforting about walking in and never wanting to spend the night away from it. Jane and Butch's house will always be my favorite, but this one is second! From sleeping on the floor waiting on movers to get our furniture here, to picking out carpet, to choosing paint, and now waiting to spruce it up even more... I know that you two love this house as much as I do. My favorite time is at night when I walk by your rooms and see you snuggled in your beds, under your soft blankets, (and those darn phones) and hearing you say, "Night, Mama! Love you!"
Today was your first day and my first day with students. I shared last night how nervous I was, but I don't think either of you knew just how nervous I was. I prayed and prayed for an easy transition to this school year, and I couldn't have planned it any better. I let go of control, and I have realized that things work out like they are supposed to be! When I drove out of Staci's driveway this morning tears flowed as I looked back at one of my very best friends including Boo with her boys in a picture. She has been through thick and thin with me... from the births of my babies...and now to Ben going to his first day of middle school. I believe she was put in life to make this transition back easier. Ben went to a new school today, but he wasn't considered new because Staci had us over with lots of little boys all summer for Ben to meet. When I saw him this afternoon, I didn't even have to ask how his day was... I could see it on his face. He told me how great each of his teachers were and how much he loved it already. I know the newness will wear off, but I also know that each of his teachers love what they do and will take care of him. For Sis, I sat in the gymnasium this morning with the entire student body of the high school and couldn't help but have cold chills. The respectful manners, the class, and the attitudes of the students were contagious. I have never been with a student body who was so well behaved. Again, I felt that everything had worked out like it was supposed to be. I had to wait on KB to get home from cheerleading to find out about her day, but she came straight to my bed ( I had to take a nap because I was just about dead) and told me about her entire day! She giggled and laughed for a long time... it's been a long time since she has looked this happy!
As I reflect back on these last few months, I couldn't have done it without the prayers, texts, and words of encouragement (especially this last week). I know that Someone is in control and HE took care of everything for my family. Thank you Lord... seriously... for making this transition easy, for all the heart breaking things we have been through, for all the tough decisions we have had to make... I have truly been humbled and know that stepping back and letting things work out is much better for everyone.
I have smiled tonight with your messages and phone calls from people asking about your day! I'm glad that you can tell them how happy you are. I hope you will always feel loved even though your family is not right next door or just a bike ride away. We are blessed... don't ever forget that!
Love,
Mama
